Really Funny Clean Jokes and Humor

There are two brunettes and three blondes.

The brunettes are in the front seat and the blondes are in the back of the truck.

Suddenly the truck goes of into the water below the bridge.

The two brunettes quickly open the doors and jump out of the truck.

About a minute later the three blondes come up out of the water gasping for air.

One of the two brunettes asked the blondes what took them so long to come up?  read more »

A blonde comes to the office with one black shoe and one white shoe.

His boss starts to yell at him:

You are ruining office reputation, go home and change the shoes.

The blonde goes home, and comes back after a while.

Boss I have a problem, the other pair of shoes at home are black and white, too.

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Santa Claus, one smart and one stupid blonde are walking together when they spot a hundred dollars on the ground.

Who will take the money?  read more »

A Blonde went to see the doctor to get the results of his brain scan.

The doctor said: “I have some bad news for you.

First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side.”

Smart Blonde interrupted, “Well, that's normal, isn't it? I thought everybody had two sides to their brain?”

The doctor replied, “That's true"  read more »

Two blondes decide to go duck hunting.

Neither one of them has ever been duck hunting before.

After several hours they still haven't bagged any.

One hunter looks at the other and says, "I just don't understand it-- why aren't we getting any ducks?"

Her friend says, "I keep telling you, I just  read more »

1. He misspells I.Q.

2. He sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

3. He took a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.

4. He thought Boyz II Men was a day care center and Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.

5. Under “education” on his job application, he put “Hooked On Phonics.”

6. He tripped over a cordless phone.

7. He spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said “concentrate.”  read more »

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water.

A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses."

"We don't have any," replied the first blonde.

"Well, if you're going to fish, you need fishing licenses," said the Game Warden.

"But officer," replied the second blonde, "we aren't fishing.  read more »

On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a blonde listened intently to the instructor.

He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.

The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"

"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."

After pondering his answer, she asked, "What happens if  read more »

A brunette is standing on some train tracks, jumping from rail to rail, saying "21" "21" "21."

A Blonde walks up, sees her and decides to join her.

She also starts jumping from rail to rail, saying "21" "21" "21".

Suddenly, the brunette hears a train whistle and jumps off the tracks just as the Blonde is splattered all over the place.

The Brunette goes back to jumping from rail to rail , counting "22" "22" "22".

Fred and his blonde wife went fishing in Alaska.

In the middle of nowhere where the place is filled with nothing but white snow.

They finally found a lake and so they cast their lines.

After an hour or two fred's wife yelled. "honey come quick i got a bite."

So Fred rush to his wife only to find out her line is lying flat and can't see any movement.

So he said "your line not moving hon, no one is biting.

I got a bite", she insist.

"Where ?" ask Fred.  read more »

A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country.

She has never been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense.

As soon as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement, running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!! BOEING!!! BO....." She forgets where she is, even the pilot in the cockpit hears the noise.

Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "BE SILENT!"  read more »