Doctor Doctor Jokes



Patient: Doctor, doctor I only have 59 seconds to live
Wait a minute!

Doctor! Doctor! my son has swallowed a pen!"
Use a pencil!

What is the best time to go to the dentist?
2:30 (tooth hurty)!

Docter docter I keep thinking I'm a rubbish bin.
Don't talk rubbish!

Doctor doctor I keep forgetting things.
What was that?
What was what?!
Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains
Pull your self together!

Doctor doctor, I think I need glasses.
Waiter: You certainly do, you've just walked into a fast food joint!!

Why was the doctor mad?
Because he had no patients!

Doctor doctor! I think I am a worm!
Well then squiggle onto the chair!

My wife thinks she's a duck!
Bring her in so i can cure her.
But! She already flew south for the winter!

Doctor doctor my mum thinks she's invisible
Where is she then?!

Dr Dr I fill like a dog.
How long this been happening?
Since I was a puppy!

A woman walked into a doctors office and said...Doctor doctor, it hurts all over...every time i touch something, it hurts.
Doctor: Well, I think You have a broken finger!

Doctor, doctor! i swallowed a sheep.
How do you feel?
I feel baaaaad!

Doctor, doctor I feel like a pair of curtains!
Pull yourself together man!!

Doctor doctor there is a strawberry growing out of my head!
That's easy just put some cream on it!

Doctor doctor I think I am a computer.
Hold on I will just connect you to the internet!"

Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a bell!
Here, take these pills and if they don't work, give me a ring!"


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